Hammering a Point Home
Wed, September 19, 2007
Filed under: Internet, Rants
Since it appears that I will be unable to finish my layout before the weekend, I thought I might as well do some blogging… lest you think I just purchased this domain (and space) for show. In case you’re wondering: if I did, it would’ve been called vera.nu.
It seems like these days the e-drama is high on the list of discussion topics, so I couldn’t possibly miss out on that. One of the things that never fails to amuse me, or at the very least make me roll my eyes, is the ever-so-popular “it’s MY site, I can do what I want here” type of comeback.
You mean that the half naked celebrity was not spawned by my over-exerted brain? For a minute here I thought that this was my OWN site. Why did I think that? Well you know I tend to get rather weird ideas. See, unlike these so-called personal site owners who write for themselves, I DO admit to caring a great deal about my visitors. Heck the only reason my font is not 7px Tahoma caps lock, is because the vast majority claim that 11-12px are more comfortable to read. Following this line of logic, it stands to reason that if I want to make it crystal clear that as many of you as possible are to come to adore me, or at the very least stalk me obsessively, I have to ensure that you CAN read said message.
But back to the issue at hand. Why do these webmasters keep stressing their ownership, and lack of willingness to so much as consider the issues mentioned? Could it be that said complainers have actually struck a nerve? Is it possible that a tiny voice in the back of said webmaster’s head is telling him/her: that ‘flamer’ is not entirely wrong?
Of course the poor victimized webmasters can’t possibly admit to this. I mean those excessively rude complainers didn’t even have the decency to mention their displeasure in private. They actually posted a blog entry/article on it. And by that they implicitly incited their followers/visitors to go and vandalize the aforementioned site.
I admit it openly: I’m immature for starting/continuing/feeding on e-drama, but at least I can do so without resorting to virtual bitch slapping , name calling and over all atrocious spelling/grammar. It’s not about who can come up with the rudest insult in the shortest amount of time. Use perfect spelling and tell me that I should be finishing those reviews I own Mar and Ben, and I’ll re-think my attitude. You claim you’re above e-drama and you’re not participating in it? So ignore me and don’t mention this/me… let alone edit your blog entry 57658 times in regards to said drama.
I’m not going to explicitly link to these uncaring webmasters’ sites for the simple reason that I am extremely egoistic and self centered person, who doesn’t want you to leave her site. However for those of you who’re curious, refer to the following blog entries: Me luvs teh interwebz dramuh!!!11, The Dramuh Llamuh, Issue 2 or PSGR in general.
I love the way you linked Rhiannon’s e-drama as “in general”, haha. So right.
Personally, I feel if victims can play the “it’s my site” card, I can say the same to defend my drama-stirring posts. It’s my site, after all.
I never said you can’t. I just don’t get why you need to mention this aspect. It’s an known fact that it’s your site and you can do/say whatever you want with/on it. The visitors are perfectly aware of this… so, why exactly are you telling me this?
Of course there’s probably some truth in victims defending their site because it’s unpleasant to be told all of a sudden that your site sucks. Some obviously take criticism better than others.
However, “it’s my site” as an argument unto itself isn’t all that bad. Some people don’t want to be told what they should and shouldn’t do with space they might have paid for or time they spent on their creations. Some people might think their grungy/skinny layouts look good and there might be a smattering of their friends who think the same. Then suddenly someone comes along and tells them “sorry you site should be THIS way”… what else can they say but “no, I don’t want to do what you’re telling me, because this is my site and I do what I feel like”.
In a similar way, if someone were to approach me and say “I’m sorry I don’t like the entries you write, it’s sooo boring to me, and I’m your visitor, so change and write something I do like”. My response WOULD probably be “well it’s my site, and I write what I want”.
Besides, if people can’t read your site, you’re going to get fewer visitors, it’s not like they’re being rewarded for having bad layouts.
I agree and don’t see anything wrong with not wanting to be told your site sucks. I don’t like to be told that either.
But I don’t see the use in telling someone it’s MY site I’m doing what I want with it. That’s a given! It’s not like I’m expecting you to change anything just because I personally don’t like it.
Whenever someone has this comeback, I just roll my eyes and think “duh!” I didn’t think it wasn’t yours or that you’d do exclusively what I want you to.
Maybe it comes down to how pushy your opinions might sound. If a religious person came up to me and said “you should believe in God”, my intuitive response would be “I believe whatever I damn well please”. I know that said religious person probably doesn’t think I was devoid of beliefs till then and I know that that they understand I have the right to believe whatever I want, but it’s a reminding message of “back off, stop FORCING your belief on me”.
If said religious person instead said “I believe in God”, I wouldn’t give that above response because they’re not forcing their belief on me. It’s just their passive opinion.
In the same way, saying “you SHOULD change your font” or “you SHOULD make a better layout” can be construed as you implicitly saying to the site owner “I want you to change your site”. The intuitive response to such a demand would be “no, *I* maintain my site, not you”, as a reminder of where the control lies. It’s not the same if you had said “I think size 7pt fonts are way too small to read” or “I think skinny layouts makes reading quite hard to read”.
I hope that made sense, I need sleep. =_=
*scratches head* It did… and I guess repeatedly telling people to change their font (for example) can very well come off as that. In that case it’s the fault of the person who keeps insisting.
Woah.. defensive much? I was reinforcing your point Vera… i.e. backing you up, giving you support, etc etc
Thanks for caring about most of your visitors, Vera. I don’t think I could handle you + 7px + all caps!
I don’t get why some people are so defensive towards drama aimed towards them. I love seeing/reading all this drama, but can’t recall any instance of being involved in one. However, I expect it would be fun fun. I actually wish someone would blog about me/my site in a negative way. It’d add so much more job to my dull school life.
@Jem:… I suck at “getting” sarcasm online
I don’t think someone should consider their site or creation their own if it contains things made by someone else, especially if the original work had a lot of effort put into it. Unless of course the material in question was personally asked for.
I’d like to say that people can do whatever they want on their own sites, but then again, if they really expect people to come visit it (that’s the whole purpose of making a website), I suggest that they at least be flexible enough to let the visitors read their goddamn miniscule font. If one does point out the said flaw, and the website owner gets offended because of a fairly logical suggestion… I do suggest starting a fight. Hahaha! Kidding!
I think there is some fun reads when it comes to e-Drama – especially the sites you mentioned does in a way so it’s fun to read. Overall – I agree with you.
I just pull out a bag of popcorn when the Drama Llamah strikes back again. I’m far too mellow (most of the time) to get involved. It’s never really been a point of interest for me. Mainly because I miss all the amusing things.
That said, it’s amazing what havoc a sidebar can wreak.
That’s the typical response that most webmasters/mistresses give when they are criticized and they simply don’t see your point. Also, there is a difference and a review with constructive criticism with valid suggestions on how to improve and a plain flame on how much one sucks.
I think that some people have been flamed so much that they resort to saying “it’s my site” to just about anyone who criticizes them (constructively or not). I somehow agree with Jem, because if when the dramuh starts you’re allowed to say “it’s my site, I do what I want” the criticizer has as much right to write whatever s/he wants in his/her site even if it is a criticism or dramuh directed at you.
Too bad that then they resort to immature comments like “lawlz thnx for the hits!” or “She’s sending all her friends here to flame me”. =P
I believe Jem was being sarcastic.
Also I never said they weren’t allowed. I just don’t see the point in using it as defense. It’s not like anyone is assuming otherwise, anyway.
Lol, this is my first time visiting your blog and I have to admit to two things. One, I have, in the past, been guilty of claiming I write solely for myself. But I have also had the luxury of having a small readership and having never been involved in said e-drama. So until it comes up and the poorly written insults fly at me, I can just say I don’t know how I’d react.
However, you’re very right in that people get very petty about very stupid things. It almost takes all the fun out of blogging.
Unless you have superior debating skills. Then it’s just plain annoying.
It’s quite admirable to write only for oneself, I have nothing against it.I was referring to those webmasters who have 49687697 win a domain, referral, whatnot kind of contests on their sites and then they claim they write “only for themselves”.
Come on Vera.. now you’ve got your own domain you should be blogging daily!
I’m swamped with work this week, but I plan on making up starting next week. *sighs* I also plan on finishing a layout… and …
Hey Vera,
It’s been so long since I’ve visited your site (to me anyways) and now you’ve got a domain. It’s a nice name, but what does it mean? Is it a word you made up or can it be found in an extremely thick dictionary? For I am too lazy to check it up.
And maybe another question – do you remember who I am? Since you are so swamped with visitors, I guess one particular little teeny bopper kiddie won’t quite remain in your memory. If not, I was from Rainbow Luck, the site which you so blogged about to being completely rubbish.
No hard feelings there.
I do hate it when sites incorporate teeny tiny fonts that are unreadable, I really don’t understand the philosophy of it. All it makes me think is how my eyes are going to worsen after reading it.
But in my opinion, I think that criticizing a site will only ever make the owner more unwilling to change, as humans have an arrogant pride to never submit to their enemies (in the case, those who insult them openly.)
Arrgh, I typed to much for a comment.
So I stop now.
Good luck!
Thank you. Yes I know who you are, especially since you were the only person named Eunice I’ve come across.
You didn’t type too much, or at any rate I don’t mind. As for the criticism being useless, it depends on the person. I’ve been criticized pretty harshly about my site, and while at the beginning I was annoyed I did change most things.
If a webmaster keeps getting criticized for a certain aspect and doesn’t do anything to change he/she will eventually loose his/her visitors. Or rather the visitors will keep having the same age (12-14) which to a 20+ year-old webmistress is kind of… you get the idea.
The site name is explained in the previous post. Lianko is a mispronunciation of “leanyka” – “little girl” in Hungarian.
Hello,
The typical “it’s my site card” yes, I know it, tsk tsk, yes, of course they lose visitors! I agree completely, if you are given a suggestion, take up on it, most of the time you wanted the suggestion or review, didn’t you?
I am so confused by eDrama, what exactly is it? LOL, *clueless*
Crissy
In this case, Bobbi-lee wrote a mocking article about PinupDoll’s sidebar. And people started ranting left and right that her sole purpose was that of presenting said site in a highly unfavorable light.
Generally, webmasters who answer like this don’t want a review. Oh sure they might actually say/write that they want your opinion, but they actually want you to state your undying love for their site. As a matter of fact, I did review someone on YS.nu, who started raging at me because I commented on every single page of hers: “how dare you take my site apart?”.